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Gay men: 'We will marry your girlfriends'


In the aftermath of an election which saw the voters of two states (Maryland and Maine) redefine marriage for the first time, CollegeHumor.com offered a snarky message from homosexual men to those of us troglodytes still arguing in favor of old-fashioned matrimony.

The video has gone bonkers on YouTube, social media, and news sites. (And John Stonestreet talks about it in today's BreakPoint commentary.) You can watch it here. Be aware that the vocabulary is colorful.

Here's the gist:

“Americans are becoming more comfortable with gay marriage, seeing it as both a moral and a civil rights issue. But there are many out there who are still fighting against the cause. And as gay men ourselves, we’d just like to say to those people, ‘Fine. Keep marriage between a man and a woman. And in response, we will marry your girlfriends.’”

They then embark on a journey through 20 years' worth of fawning media-generated stereotypes of the "gay man," in order to justify an unbelievably creepy thesis that--if they wanted to--homosexuals could steal our womenfolk. Among the evidence marshaled, we're informed that everyone knows gay men are smarter, more muscular, better dressed, more fun, and (I am not making this up) better at sexually pleasing ladies than hetero men. After all, women already enjoy the friendship of gays more than straight guys anyway. Didn't you know?

They conclude that fellas who oppose gay "marriage" had better back off, because we don't stand a chance against the masculine charms of--wait for it--homosexuals.

When a gay friend of mine posted the video on Facebook, I immediately started coming up with uncharitable comebacks. But in a moment of better judgment, I linked instead to a piece from earlier this year by Marc Barnes over at Bad Catholic (a Patheos.com blog). In it, he bemoans "Our Godawful Objectification of Men with Same-Sex Attraction," and notes how many of the stereotypes CollegeHumor invokes represent insulting reductions of human beings to little better than lapdogs. It's worth quoting in full:

"The Gay Best Friend Abstraction isn’t just a false category in which to place a person — it is an amputation of the person. When girls want a 'gay best friend' they certainly aren’t asking for a unique human being, with all aching, terrifying desires human beings contain, who will work for their ultimate good to the point of death. They want an accessory. The 'Gay Best Friend' must — above all things — be safe. He must have all the emotional benefits of being a male, without the emotional threats. He must be supportive, without reminding her of the father-figures in her life. He must provide the emotional affirmation of male, physical touch, without touch ever meaning anything. He must be a girl, provide fashion advice, and — in general — have all the characteristics of a puppy on happy pills."

Such is the picture of gay men impressed upon our culture by popular media. Evidently, we're now expected to nod obediently and even laugh when these stereotypes are invoked. I know religious conservatives are supposed to be losing this battle. But it seems to me same-sex-attracted men are the ones paying the highest cost.

Comments:

Gina and Georgia
I was also uncomfortable with POI last week. My reaction was to sigh deeply, and then watch the program in which 2 women are lovers (gag!). I enjoyed the action and the plotting to get the blonde out of the park, and tried not to think about the rest. I don't know either of the actresses enough to know if they are homosexuals or straight in their private lives, but in this economy it seems to me that, if you are offered work, you take it. I don't like it, but I can understand it.
I wasn't thrilled about that either. As I remarked on Twitter at the time, we'll soon be at the point -- if we're not already -- where every show will have its token Same-Sex Marriage Moment of Approval. (A bit like Orwell's Two Minutes Hate, in its way.)

But one thing I've learned over the years is that even devout Christian actors, if they're working in the mainstream, sometimes have to say lines and perform actions that don't line up with their own beliefs. My hope and prayer is that Jim Caviezel's influence for good (and by all accounts, he has a very strong influence for good) will outweigh any such moments.
gays will marry your daughters
Thursday morning I listened to the Break Point commentary. And agreed with it whole heartedly. I choose to not watch much network tv for the homosexual agneda that is sooooo easily recognized. I have been watching Person of Interest on NBC for two seasons now-knowing Jim Caviesel to be a Christian. Last nights episode envolved a lesbian married couple!!! I could have just died with shame. I have sent an email to CBS-for all the good it will do-expressing my disappointment. Does ancient Rome come to anyones mind? We need a Paul and Barnabas!!
I'm almost afraid to respond to this because I don't have the kind of information Kathy has. However, I can say that it's been common knowledge among women in the "boonies" that, if you need a "safe" friend, look for a homosexual. He's part girlfriend, part boyfriend, and can understand you in ways a straight man never will. I have been friends with a couple of these men over a lifetime, and I believe they are fully capable of carrying out their threat. FYI.
A Nation's Songs
Great article, John!

If you have the time, listen to the 11/01/12 Focus on the Family program, entitled "The Plight of the Modern-Day Orphan". Paul McCusker, who has recently dramatized "Oliver Twist", talks about the "power of story" and how, in the past 40-50 years, "the other side" has effectively changed our culture by telling better stories, not by passing legislation and carrying placards, etc. He also points out that those stories, such as Norman Lear's "All in the Family" and "Maude", on up to those of the present day, have been extremely well done.

Keep up the good work!