Suzanne Venker's article "The war on men" has been causing a considerable amount of buzz and some division, including among Christians. Her premise is that, if there's a problem with men these days, it's all women's fault. A sample:
"It’s all so unfortunate -- for women, not men. Feminism serves men very well: they can have sex at hello and even live with their girlfriends with no responsibilities whatsoever. . . .
"So if men today are slackers, and if they’re retreating from marriage en masse, women should look in the mirror and ask themselves what role they’ve played to bring about this transformation.
"Fortunately, there is good news: women have the power to turn everything around. All they have to do is surrender to their nature -- their femininity -- and let men surrender to theirs.
"If they do, marriageable men will come out of the woodwork."
Really? Because the woodwork around here, for me and my fellow celibate traditionalist Christian singles, looks awfully quiet.
Venker's intentions are honorable, I'm sure. But like most pundits who believe they've found some sort of magic solution to the world's ills, she grossly oversimplifies. The truth is, being feminine and celibate these days is no guarantee that you're going to snag yourself a husband. The current singles scene, including among Christians, is far too complex for any one-size-fits-all answer to solve the problem of women who want to get married but can't.
Don't believe me? Consider this: The Botkin sisters have made a career, literally, out of being feminine and elevating men. They were trained from birth -- and I do mean from birth -- to submit to their future husbands and to become the mothers of many. They are, quite possibly, the most feminine women on the planet. And now here they are, rapidly approaching 30, still stuck in the same boat with the rest of us celibate Christian single women.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: Our obedience does not control God. We're to obey Him not for what we can get out of Him, but simply because He told us to obey Him. We can follow Him as closely as humanly possible, but nothing we do will either force Him to give us what we want, or control the behavior of any other human being (let alone an entire gender). Christians, of all people, should know better than to pretend that it will.